We all have freedom to return to the divine

Stäna Knez

July 3, 2010

As I was finishing high school and heading for college, Janis Joplin’s rendition of “Me & Bobby McGee” was topping the music charts. I felt confused by the lyric “Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.”

My world was full of things I didn’t want to lose. I was headed out into the grown-up world to live on my own. I was involved in demonstrations against the Vietnam war; establishing a spiritual practice different from my family; making fledgling choices about all kinds of things I wanted and needed in my life.

Accepting life the way it was, including my high school buddies coming home in body bags, just wasn’t OK. It felt as if there was so much to lose!

I thought this must be the freedom to be an adult and choose, but in retrospect I realize I didn’t feel one bit free. I was pursuing what I thought I had to do, be or have according to my belief about how to be a good person. Soon, I began learning about the divine in a way I’d never understood before.

Little by little, I came to understand the oneness of all life and the divine love that absolutely pervades all that is. Little by little, I also saw that my need for things to be a certain way held me in discomfort, or even in downright pain.

It was my perception or choice about everything in my world that gave it the power to be disruptive or hurtful. Further, when I gave my focus to the disruption or the hurt, that was what expanded in my experience.

In the Science of Mind textbook, Dr. Ernest Holmes writes: “Freedom is the birthright of every living soul, but man must make that great discovery for himself. The Divine intends freedom for us. The very fact that we have creative thought, and are individuals, presupposes the use of our creativeness in more than one way.”

I came to realize that the upsets that were holding me hostage were not the way things had to be. I could use my creative nature “in more than one way,” which, for me, meant shifting to a spirit-focused life. I began learning to be against nothing and “for” the life-enhancing qualities of love, truth, beauty, intelligence, peace, joy, abundance, right action and wholeness. Slowly but surely, this loosed my grip on outcomes and things.

I began to feel true, deep peace inside myself and a sense of spiritual connection to all, which freed me from a need to resent, antagonize or think badly of others with a different viewpoint.

I saw this shift moving me to a place of making a real contribution to peace. I was also free to grieve and bless my fallen classmates without resentment or conflict in my heart.

Now when I hear Janis’ words, they remind me to put down everything outside of myself and return to the ever-present divine in all, recognizing that our liberty and freedom is always available.

The Rev. Stäna Knez is a minister at the Center for Spiritual Living and a member of Lane Interfaith Alliance. This column is coordinated by LIA to offer inspiration, share personal spiritual experiences and bring a deeper understanding of individual faith perspectives with the intention of blessing our community and the world. For more information, visit www.laneinterfaithalliance.org or call 541-344-0430.